New Years Resolution

New Year, New me…BS. If you scroll through my old posts you will see how I feel about this. In a nutshell, you don’t need a New Year to change or do better, any day of the week will do. Nonetheless, is a great symbolism. January 1, or 1-1, master number 11 for those that know about numerology.

The thing I want to master this year and for the rest of my life is happiness.

It’s so simple, I just want to be happy. I want to do less of the ‘have to’ and more of the ‘want to’.  I feel like its such a simple idea yet so hard to do.  I’m an adult and I have responsibilities. Those things that make adulting so exhausting.

How can I get away from responsibilities?

I mulled this question over in my head and the answer is I can’t, no one can unless you are stupidly rich and people do everything for you.  If you are a normal person, its part of being a grown-up, you are going to have to do it.

Adulting means that you are going to be responsible for something other than yourself. At the very least you will have a cell phone bill.

So I figured since after the age of 18 one can’t get away from being an adult and we have to do this responsibility thing, I can at least put a positive spin on it. Like putting sugar on the corn flakes, it tastes better that way. After all, if I learn to like it then it will no longer be a ‘have to’ but a ‘want to’.  As a last resort If I can’t like it then I will change it.

Each year that passes by reminds me how short life can be and living without joy is not the best way to live it. Imagine me, gathering all my grandchildren to hear my life stories and all of them have to do with those things that I had to do. I wouldn’t want to look back at that! I definitely wouldn’t want to share that! Time to make up some stories grandma!

Wanting to be liked or accepted by others can push us to devote more time than we should on those things that do not bring us joy. I love those memes that say “sorry I’m too busy, I made plans with my cats” or “ my Friday night consists of books and wine”. I made up that last one. But you get it! Do what makes you happy. I’m not talking about being selfish and like a T-Rex stepping over everyone to get what you want with your tiny little hands. That’s not what I am talking about. I’m talking about being genuinely happy. When I’m truly happy, I can be kind and be giving to others. When I am not, I’m a nimbus cloud, raining on everyone. That’s what I’m talking about.

There’s so much pressure to be so many different things that sometimes the hardest thing to say is “no”. “No I don’t want to go, I’m going to take that time to decompress”. You may love your solitude, you may love animals or you may love being surrounded by people, then do just that.

Once I came across a hello kitty notepad. It was so lovely and I really wanted to buy it. I put it in my cart and then I took it out. My son saw me doing this and he asked me why. I told him because I am too old to be getting that and someone may say just that. He reminded me of the day I taught him to not care about others opinion and do what he knows is right and he turned that message right to me. He told me “who cares mom, you like it, then get it who cares what other people think”. I almost cried at the store. Who would have known that my tidbit of mommy wisdom was getting through to this soon to be adult. I grabbed my hello kitty notepad and bought it. It cost me a whopping $2.36 and I was happy with my purchase. No one said anything about my notepad, instead, I was asked where I found it. So simple the idea of being happy, yet so hard to do sometimes.